It’s a new year, but we still have old traditions to uphold. If you’re like me, the resolution you made was to not suffer any bad beats in 2023 — which, like most resolutions, we all failed at keeping within hours. New year, same tears — so let’s start filling some buckets.
Reliaquest Bowl
Illinois vs. No. 22 Mississippi State
This game was already incredibly emotional as the college football community mourned the loss of former Mississippi State head coach Mike Leach. That emotion was on full display after the Bulldogs took their first lead with only seconds remaining in the game.
Will Rogers was with Mike Leach all three years in Starkville.
After the game-winning FG goes through, Rogers takes a moment to let it all sink in.
You can see what today’s win means for Mississippi State. pic.twitter.com/epxTbpyhS5
— Ben Stevens (@BenScottStevens) January 2, 2023
You knew in a game honoring Leach that it wouldn’t come to a close without something wild, memorable and unpredictable. A good old game of ‘pitchy pitchy woo woo” — which feels even more awkward when I write it than it does when I hear SVP say it — gave us this incredible cover for Mississippi State.
1:50
Mississippi State’s defense comes up big on the final play of the game to seal win vs. Illinois.
The college football world is a little less bright without Coach Leach in it and I can’t think of a more fitting way to honor his memory and legacy than that ending.
Five buckets of tears for the moment, the man and the cover.
Sunday NFL Action
Miami Dolphins at New England Patriots
This guy gets it. He gets what it means to be a fan.
The Dolphins were 8-3.
They are now 8-8. pic.twitter.com/lyuMjHpEHQ
— Action Network (@ActionNetworkHQ) January 2, 2023
And I don’t think even he knows who the heck Skylar Thompson is. For those of you keeping track at home: No, he isn’t a character in a new reboot of “Beverly Hills, 90210.” My guy has gone from being the third string quarterback for Miami to being its starter next week for the season finale against the Jets after Teddy Bridgewater left the game with an injury. Now, the point total on this one was 43.5, which 83% of you at Caesars had placed bets on. Even more incredible? 95% of the money came in on the under. So, imagine the delight most people felt when a quarterback they’d never heard of was throwing footballs at invisible ghosts on the field instead of Miami’s myriad of weapons. Well, that all went to you know where on this play with about a minute to go.
#KStateFB alum Skylar Thompson finds his first official NFL touchdown this afternoon:pic.twitter.com/axOH3a0cUO
— Tejay Cleland (@KWCHTejay) January 1, 2023
Look, I’m always happy for anyone that gets their shine in the NFL. Truly. But you know darn well you threw up a little in your mouth when you realized that his first NFL touchdown turned out to be your dream crusher.
Three buckets of “God, we all miss Tua” tears.
Carolina Panthers at Tampa Bay Buccaneers
Josh Norman went from making espressos to playing corner in a matter of days and it looked early on like he gave the Panthers the caffeine jolt they needed. Carolina jumped out to the early 14-0 lead and lead 21-10 in the fourth quarter. But we all know that a caffeine kick can wear off — and then, just like that, things got wild. Tom Brady and Mike Evans decided to absolutely destroy fantasy football championship games everywhere and made it look easy along the way. I don’t know what’s more incredible: the win, the comeback or that Brady actually ran for a touchdown.
Tom Brady QB sneak? Love to see it.pic.twitter.com/ilYrlCGrWf
— DraftKings (@DraftKings) January 1, 2023
With another team on the field, the Panthers had the cover the entire damn game until Brady went full … well … Brady and made sure that the 68% of money in this game bet on the Bucs would not go to waste.
Four buckets of “here we go again with the Brady talk” tears. Ugh.
Bad Boy Mowers Pinstripe Bowl
Ok. Let me start by saying I’m extremely disappointed in both of these teams for not having pinstripes for the Pinstripe Bowl. I mean, bowl games are all about the swag and if you’re playing at Yankee Stadium in a bowl that tells you specifically what you are expected to wear but you blatantly disobey the rules of fashion, you deserve whatever you get.
Rant over … Maybe.
As for the game … 4th and goal down from the 8-yard line down by 15 with 2:43 to go — what could go wrong? Well, for Minnesota the win was certainly not in doubt, but for Minnesota bettors at -10.5 everything fell apart.
PJ Fleck is now 3-1 ATS in bowls in Minnesota — so I can only hope he’s learned his lesson regarding stripes.
One bucket of sheer disappointment tears.
Autozone Liberty Bowl
Arkansas was up 25 in this game when Kansas woke up and went full on Hulk Hogan. You remember it as a kid, right? Hulk is in a sleeper hold … the arm is lifted and falls to the side limp as can be. First, the arm is lifted again. The second ominous fall is inevitable. It’s the third fall, though, where the drama begins. Just as his arm is set to hit the mat and the match will be over, he instead manages somehow to keep is hand from touching and starts shaking his arm as he comes back to his feet fully awake and ready to destroy his enemy.
That was Kansas, as they did this.
THE JAYHAWKS SCORE A TD, RECOVER THE ONSIDE KICK, SCORE ANOTHER TD, AND CONVERT THE THE 2-PT TRY.
TIE GAME IN THE LIBERTY BOWL 🤯 pic.twitter.com/O2xlXnguIf
— CFB Kings (@CFBKings) December 29, 2022
I mean, tell me these don’t look like Hulkamaniacs. Hawkamaniacs, maybe? Also, is putting Hawkamaniacs in this article the same as trademarking the phrase? Asking for a friend?
When @KU_Football tied it @LibertyBowl ❤️💙 pic.twitter.com/tnHC3PFrTP
— Mary Carpenter (@MaryCarp30) December 29, 2022
The gloriously awful part of all of this is that Arkansas was favored by 2.5, which we all knew was useless the minute we got to double overtime and teams were then forced to go for 2 on every touchdown. Couple that with college football’s inevitability of points leading to hitting the over, and bettors everywhere were sitting here wishing they were watching repeats of WrestleMania 3 instead of this dumpster fire.
Five buckets of sweaty Hulkster tears.
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